The Smells of Motherhood

I never thought I'd love the smell of a freshly opened pack of diapers and I'm wondering if I'm a little bit crazy because I don't mind the smell of spit up on my shirt. I love apple juice kisses and have discovered that Gushers' breath reminds me of yucky medicine. I never thought I'd sit in a bathroom while someone went #2 just to keep them company. A bath renews a child's innocent scent. Rubber boots and no socks don't mix well. Thrown-up cheese is disgusting. I can actually smell unclean hands and when we've gone one too many days without a bath. Baby's breath smells sweet and a sweaty child reminds me of hot summer days on the playground. I can actually smell a snotty nose and a cold coming on. Chocolate chip cookies baking in the oven represent more than a yummy treat; they represent quality time spent making them with my son. I never knew that smells could be so defining of who I am right now....

Keep Me Safe

We've had a good, fairly calm week. I had Miles home with me part time this week and really enjoyed the extra time with him. He's so cute with Hailey for the most part. He loves tickling her cheeks and always says something like "you are so little", "Baby Hailey is so nice", "Hello little girl" and "you are so silly, you are so silly!" He talks about doing things because he is big and then tells her she has to wait until she is bigger to do them too because she is so little. He also tells her that he loves her and that he missed her. When he gets home from school, he can't wait to see her, give her hugs and kisses, and hold her. It's really cute!

We went to church, Hailey's first time, on Sunday and actually had to leave early because the kids behind us wouldn't leave her alone. The church was packed and I had no where to move to. They kept touching and her or her carrier and it was really bothering me. She even ended up with a shoe landing on her face! From now on, I'll remember to look who we are sitting by!

We're loving Ahmad's new job and his nice new schedule. He sets his own schedule and has been able to spend a lot of extra time at home, but still is getting his work done. That's awesome! Friday he was home in the morning before his appointment, so I left Hailey home with him and took Miles to run a few errands. It was nice to just have time alone with him. However, Ahmad then had to work in the morning on Saturday. Miles had said he wanted to go to the library again and get new books, but when it came time to go, he decided he wanted to stay home and play instead. It was a very pleasant morning and we played several different things. He got out his blocks that can make bugs and we made a few bugs and then played pretend with them for some time. It was very interesting to see Miles learn to play pretend and see his ideas develop. I tried a few new games with him, but they didn't exactly play out. We tried hide and seek and he got it, kind of. He didn't hide well, which I knew to expect, but then he was telling me where to hide. It was a good try at the game, but he wasn't interested in it for too long. I also tried to do a scavenger hunt with him, telling him different things in the house to go and find. Well, he would tell me where the things were, but he didn't want to go get them. That didn't last too long either. Then I got out his glue stick and scissors, which is always a big hit. I wanted to try to do a collage with him, but he was really more interested in just cutting paper. I cut out some things for him to glue down, which he did, but overall, I would say he's not quite ready for collages!

Saturday was beautiful and when Ahmad got home from work, he took Miles outside for a bit. I was getting a little cabin fever and we decided to go out to dinner. It was Hailey's first dinner out and she slept right through it! Miles did fairly well, but didn't really nap earlier in the day, so he was getting to the end of his rope by the end of the meal. Sunday morning, we had a nice visit from the Azar family, who was in town visiting friends. It was nice to see them and introduce them to Hailey. They brought down the Bumbo seat that we had lent them and I tried it out on Hailey yesterday. She was actually able to sit in it! She sat for about 5 minutes before getting fussy, which I thought was pretty good. I'm surprised she's able to do it already!

Miles has been acting out a bit now towards Hailey. He walked by her while she was in her swing the other day and bopped her with a toy bowling pin. It didn't hurt her, but that was the first time I'd seen him do anything other than love on her. Of course he got a time out for that! Then he also reached out too aggressively towards her the following day. Again, another time out and a stern talking too. Nothing but niceness since then, but I've got my eye on him!

Hailey has been doing well. She's smiling more and seems to be cracking herself up at various things. She's not laughing out loud yet, but you can tell her little head is filled with giggles! She's awake more and more, but it seems that if she's up a lot one day, she sleeps the next! She's also been spitting up a lot here and there and having some gas issues. She also seems to be choking sometimes. She did that several times in the hospital and in the first few days at home, but hasn't really since then. We'll have to keep an eye on that and see how it goes. I picked up some gas drops today to see if that helps at all. Hopefully it will and it won't be a huge issue.

The other night, after our nightly rituals, Miles called out for us again. Ahmad went back to see what he needed and came out to get me, saying Miles was asking for me. I went in and he wanted to bug bug with me again. I agreed to one more moon and then it was time to sleep. We were laying there snuggling when all the sudden, Miles wrapped his arms around me and said "keep me safe". I wasn't sure at all where that came from or that he would really even know that concept and my heart skipped a beat. I held him back and replied that of course I would keep him safe. We held onto each other for a minute before he told me he heard a noise and asked what it was. I hadn't heard it and he moved on to a new topic of conversation. That moment keeps tugging at my heart....of course I always want to keep my children safe. I only hope that I can.

Before I Was a Mom

Before I was a Mom,
I never tripped over toys
or forgot words to a lullaby.
I didn't worry whether or not
my plants were poisonous.
I never thought about immunizations.

Before I was a Mom,
I had never been puked on.
Pooped on.
Chewed on.
Peed on.
I had complete control of my mind
and my thoughts.
I slept all night.

Before I was a Mom ,
I never held down a screaming child
so doctors could do tests.
Or give shots.
I never looked into teary eyes and cried.
I never got gloriously happy over a simple grin.
I never sat up late hours at night
watching a baby sleep.

Before I was a Mom,
I never held a sleeping baby just because
I didn't want to put them down.
I never felt my heart break into a million pieces
when I couldn't stop the hurt.
I never knew that something so small
could affect my life so much.
I never knew that I could love someone so much.
I never knew I would love being a Mom.

Before I was a Mom,
I didn't know the feeling of
having my heart outside my body.
I didn't know how special it could feel
to feed a hungry baby.
I didn't know that bond
between a mother and her child.
I didn't know that something so small
could make me feel so important and happy.

Before I was a Mom,
I had never gotten up in the middle of the night
every 10 minutes to make sure all was okay.
I had never known the warmth,
the joy,
the love,
the heartache,
the wonderment
or the satisfaction of being a Mom ...
I didn't know I was capable of feeling so much,
before I was a Mom.

-Taken from an Email Forward

Amazing Mazes

I am so impressed with Miles right now that I just had to write a short entry. We pulled out his little learning computer and I asked him to show me how to use it. He hasn't used it too much or really done too many of the activities on it since he got it for Christmas. He pulled up some games and found a maze activity to do. It's a set of 3 mazes, each one getting harder than the previous one. Miles had trouble navigating the mouse to work through the maze, but his instructions to me on where to go were impeccable. Every maze was different and out of about 15 mazes that he completed, he only messed up twice and even then he back tracked and found the right path. After watching me to do them, he did take the mouse and was able to work it much better. He would check out the new maze for a minute and then proceed to the end. There were even multiple ways to get to the end on some of them and he often found ways that I didn't even see at first or that were the harder of the options available. I am so impressed! I have no idea how he knew how to do these and never would have thought he could do them! Yea Miles!

I also took Hailey to the doctor today for her 1 month check up. She's doing fabulous! She's gained almost another pound-up to 10 pounds and 10 ounces now, falling into the 90th percentile for weight again. She grew 1/4 inch, falling into the 50th percentile this time. Her head also grew about a cm, measuring 38 cm. She also got a shot. No concerns at all on the doctor's part!

Two amazing kids whom I love very much!!! :)

Sharing Bubba

Hailey at 3 weeks old

We are really settling in with Hailey now. I can't believe she's already a month old! On one hand, it feels like she's been a part of our family forever, but on the other hand, time is flying by so fast! She's really growing a lot and starting to fill out now. She's smiling more and more and coo-ing and ahh-ing. It's so much fun to see her grow. She outgrew her first outfit this week and I think a drawful of onesies are next! When I was pregnant, I wondered how it would feel to see a second child meet their milestones and grow, change and develop. I wondered if it would have any lost appeal or excitement because we had already been through it all with Miles. It hasn't! It's just as special and exciting to see Hailey do new things as it was to see Miles do them. And it's so wonderful to Miles grow and change and be a big brother. He has a whole new role in the family now and he's doing a wonderful job at it. He truly loves Hailey and spending time with her.

Hailey's 1 month photo

Miles couldn't resist a photo opt with Hailey

Last week, dad was finally strong and well enough to leave the hospital, so we decided to make a trip to New Albany so he could meet Hailey for the first time. It was a great visit and we really enjoyed spending time with Grampie, Nana, and Uncle Michael. Ahmad stayed behind to work since he just started a new job and had lots of learning to do. We also managed to see Nikki and the Keltner family while we were there. It was a good visit, but we were happy to get home to daddy too!

Last week was our first full week of Miles going to daycare part time, but since we were in New Albany for part of the week, it really went fast. He's at daycare today and tomorrow, but this week has gone really well with him home more. I love being a "stay at home mom"! It does present it's own challenges and I do wish I had so much to spend with both of the kids individually, but all in all, it's going well. Monday we went to the library, a place we've only taken Miles to like twice. He loved it! There was a child friendly computer that he enjoyed playing on while I picked out some books for him. He even got his own library card! I remember (with the help of my mom's memory) getting my first library card. I was pretty young as well and absolutely loved the librarian. I wanted so badly to get my own library card, but you had to be able to print your name to get a card. I worked so hard to learn to do this! Miles is already talking about going back and getting new books. I'm not sure why we never did this before! I'd often thought about it, but never really got around to it. One of the perks of being home more I guess.

We also had a wonderful visit from our old neighbors. They brought us Chinese and gifts for Hailey and Miles and we had a nice play date night!

Miles continues to process our new family. The other day, he started talking about how he and Hailey share a mommy. Then he said that they also share a daddy. Then he said that they could share Bubba too! Bubba is my wonderful friend out in Iowa whom he's met on several occasions. It's so funny to me that he talks about her. She's made quite an impression on him because he talks about her randomly fairly often.

I couldn't resist some photo opts of the two!

Another funny thing that Miles does now is whenever Hailey spits up or I say she's going to spit up, he takes off! If you've read my previous post about her spitting up on him, you understand what I mean. He remembers that and makes sure it doesn't happen again! It's pretty funny to see him just jet at the first sign!

We had a great weekend and spent most of the day Saturday with our good friends the Kleins. It was their daughter Lauren's first birthday party and we really enjoyed their party! Miles loves playing with Jeff, Lauren's dad. He always rough houses with him and loves to tackle him. He got going during the party and Lauren was absolutely cracking up at him! It was too funny to hear her laughs at Miles. Happy Birthday Lauren!




Yesterday, I could tell Miles was getting a bit stir crazy and needed to work off some energy. It was a nicer day than we'd been having, but still too cold to have Hailey out playing. So, we went to Chick-Fil-A for lunch and play time on their slide and play equipment. Miles was pretty shy at first and didn't want to go on it, although that's all he talked about during lunch and couldn't get done eating fast enough to go play. Eventually, he warmed up and had fun playing with the other kids. While he was playing, I was chatting with another mom watching her kids. It was funny...I felt like such a mom! We chatted about the kids, work, daycare, potty training. It was interesting that it just struck me that I was a mom and could carry on those conversations with complete strangers. Very fun.

Now Miles is at school today and Hailey is enjoying some peace and quiet and taking a nap in her swing. We are heading out in a bit to pick up our photos from JC Penny's and then to Hailey's 1 month check up. Should be another great day!

Stay on the Road Mommy!

Thursday, Hailey earned her First Smile sticker on her calendar! She's been smiling off and on, but we attributed it to reflexes. Then on Thursday, she smiled several times directly at me and also at Ahmad! It was such an adorable precious smile and I can't wait to see more of it! Hopefully I'll even catch it on film soon. She also is turning her head to follow me when I move around the room and is grasping onto me, my clothes and my hair. I love seeing her change and grow already! So amazing!

So today Ahmad had to work part of the day, which means I was home alone with both the kids for really the first time of any length of time. I've been home alone with them for an hour or so in the evening, but not much longer than that. I have to admit I was a bit apprehensive about how it would go. I figured it was a bit of a test run before Miles starts daycare part time and I'll have them both home most of the week. It went really well! I don't think Hailey got as much sleep as she would have liked, but everything else went great: we did play-do, ran from lions, played in Hailey's room, danced, ate lunch, and even got to our tax appointment on time! Yea us!

Miles has been playing a lot of video games lately, namely Mario Kart with Ahmad. Sometimes I play with him, but I usually try to get out of it. Well, I played with him this evening and let's just say that it's pretty sad when your 3 year old tells you to stay on the road!

Settling In

Hailey's second week with us has gone just as smoothly as her first! We're getting into a bit of routine and everything is going really well. Miles continues to enjoy her and hasn't really had any trouble adjusting thus far. I couldn't have asked for him to be adjusting any better than he is. I guess all the books we read and talks we had about the baby really paid off! Ahmad passed his insurance license test and started a new job selling supplemental Medicare insurance. He's really excited about this job and can't wait to get started! I hope this is the nitch he's been looking for! Hailey and I continue to hang out during the day and enjoy being with each other. She's such a sweetheart! We've been able to get out some and usually take and pick up Miles from school (he's so excited when she comes!) and have even run some errands together. She's a good shopping buddy! It seems when Miles was born, it was really hard to get back into reality and go to the store, pay bills, etc, but with Hailey, it seems very second nature and very necessary. I still remember my first shopping trip alone with Miles when he was little. We went to Walmart for a regular shopping trip and I was so nervous and felt like I was in such a rush! I was so concerned he'd wake up in the middle of the trip and cry or need nursed or something and I wasn't sure what I'd do. He slept the whole time and did great, but I remember that panicked feeling. Things with Hailey have gone much smoother and she did great on her first Walmart trip. We also went to the bank one day and to Kohls to get new outfits for our family photos. She did wake up at Kohls, but her timing was great-I was in the dressing room, so I just nursed her there and she went back to sleep!

Daddy does Hailey's hair

Watching TV in the morning before school

Helping mommy bake and clean

We had another great weekend with lots of visitors; Matt, Missy, Gavin, Emmett, Mom, and Michael all came to visit. We spent Saturday at our house just hanging out and playing. The boys had a blast playing together exploring all the toys and opening gifts that everyone had brought for them. We even had a little birthday celebration for Emmett since he'll be two soon! On Sunday we went to JC Penny's to have photos taken. We wanted to capture newborn photos, 3 year old photos, family photos, and cousin photos. It was a tall order, and it started out very rough, but in the end we did get some good shots. After the photos, we headed over to the Children's Museum and the boys had a blast exploring all the fun things to do. Hailey also had fun and slept through her first museum trip! She didn't wake once while we were there. It was sad to see Matt, Missy and the boys go. We don't get to see them often enough and always enjoy it so much when they visit. Hopefully we'll be seeing them again soon!

Miles was insisting on holding Hailey and wanted her facing him. As soon as I turned her around, she spit up all over him!! It was hilarious-Miles even laughed after he figured out what happened!

Hailey's first bow

Yesterday, I took Hailey and Miles to the doctor for their well checks. They are both doing great! While we waited, Miles had a ball playing in their playroom with some older kids. There was a playhouse with a slide and everything and the boys were running all around hiding from Miles. Miles kept saying "other kids, wait for me!" It was cute. Hailey did great at her check up and proved that I didn't just feel like she was eating all the time, but she really was! When she was born, she weighed 8 pounds. She now weighs 9 pounds 11 ounces! In just over 2 weeks! That put her in the 90th percentile for weight. She was measured at 20 3/4 inches, which means she grew an inch since birth and fell into the 75th percentile. Her head has also grown going from 36 cm to 37 1/2 cm. Guess she's trying to catch up to Miles already! Miles weighed in at 35 pounds, falling into the 75th percentile and his height was 36 1/2 inches, falling into the 50th percentile. However, I don't think he was standing straight against the wall because at home he measures almost 2 inches taller. Anyway, he did so well, I was very impressed with him! They even took his blood pressure, which I thought was funny, and gave him 2 shots. He did well with them, only whimpering on the second shot. On the way out of the office, he was walking very slowly saying that his leg hurt. Then on the way home, he was whimpering and saying how the nurse hurt him and gave him an owie. He also commented on the way home that he was sad because his leg hurt and the bandaid made him very very happy but he wasn't happy yet because his leg still hurt! He wanted me to help him out of the car and wouldn't bend his knee or anything. It was very funny! I had to also help him into the house and onto the couch. I gave him a popsicle and we watched a movie. That made it all better!

Today we're just hanging out and I'm trying to get some things done while Hailey sleeps. However, I'm planning on a nice nap with her later on today! I think she's starting to really smile already-it's such a precious smile!!! Melts my heart! Next week I'm going to start keeping Miles home part time so that we can enjoy some extra time together while I'm off work. He's going to go to daycare just 2 days a week. I am looking forward to being able to do some fun things with him!

Last night, I took Miles to go potty and when I came back, this was the scene I found...!